These summer preparations can make all the difference in creating a smooth transition
The summer between high school graduation and starting college is an exciting and, often, somewhat unusual time. A major chapter has just closed, and most students are ready for the opportunity for rest and relaxation that the summer provides—rightfully so. At the same time, there is a sense of urgency that is impossible to satisfy. The anticipation of a new beginning and at least a little anxiety about entering a world of unknowns casts a unique haze over the summer, one that simultaneously looks impatiently to the future and clings nostalgically to the familiarity of the past.
Calming Nerves and Quelling Fears
Many students take this time in stride, finding the uncertainty of the near future a fuel for excitement rather than trepidation. A foray into new territory is an adventure just waiting to be explored.
Then, there are students more like me.
I spent the entire summer before my freshman year of college in a constant state of low-level panic.
Don't get me wrong: I was excited to go to college! But I was also terrified of all the unknowns. I had never really even liked sleepovers as a kid, so moving a nine-hour drive away from my parents was unfathomable. As an only child, I had never experienced sharing space with anyone else, let alone a stranger. I found myself grasping desperately for any sort of solid ground that might help me prepare for the day to day realities of this impending shift, but I kept coming up empty-handed.
Now, I'm creating the sort of resource I wish I would've found when I was getting ready to transition to college. Without further ado, here are the top tips I recommend for easing even the strongest "what-if"ers' fears about starting college.
1. Create something you can bring to campus with you to help maintain a level of control over your environment.
One of my greatest sources of stress before move-in was not being able to fully know what my living situation would be like. Sure, I had seen a sample dorm room on a previous campus visit, but that was a different building than mine on the opposite side of campus. Plus, I had no idea what my roommate's taste would be like and what vibe she would bring to our shared space.
For me, this was a deeply unsettling uncertainty, and I had a lot of anxiety well up because of this unknown. So, my dad and I looked up the rules about what you could bring to the dorm, learned that it was possible to make your own loft bed (as long as it met certain requirements), and decided to build one together.
Why was this such a game-changer? For one, I could not only visualize but feel and customize a piece of where I'd be living for the next year. Plus, the fact that we worked on it for so many hours meant that it quickly became a highly familiar and, therefore, comfortable item.
When everything felt new and uncertain, this piece of furniture would feel homey, like an old friend, and that would make everything else that much more okay.
Finally, having a project like this forced me to think about my upcoming transition throughout the summer, but it did so in a way that was less direct and, therefore, less scary. I'd find myself thinking about playing video games with the built-in TV mount we had created or tucking into a productive evening in the little "cave" we had planned in the space beneath the lifted bed, and those thoughts suddenly weren't quite so intimidating.
Of course, your project need not be as large or time-consuming as a custom loft bed! Nevertheless, anything that you can do to create a piece of certainty, something uniquely and definitively yours that you can bring with you when you enter this new chapter, can help.
2. Learn the services available both on and near campus.
This one might sound obvious, but taking the time to look over what you have available to you both on and close to campus bit by bit over the summer is a great idea. Yes, most of these services will be introduced during orientation, but the reality is that orientation is such a whirlwind of activity that few things actually stick in memory.
I took time exploring my campus's website to learn about the services that were offered through various departments on campus. To keep things manageable, I'd look at no more than two departments per day, sometimes breaking larger offices over multiple days to learn what they had to offer without becoming overwhelmed. I did the same thing with services beyond campus, making sure I knew where some important places like urgent cares and banks were and how I could get to them.
There are several benefits to taking the time to explore in this way.
Most campuses have more services than you can imagine.
I learned that I could attend free yoga classes, hang out with therapy dogs, try playing a full-blown organ, and more through campus offerings. I never would have looked for these things outright, but knowing they existed and were available to me only boosted my level of excitement about going.
Additionally, I learned about services that would help me should I encounter unexpected challenges like the death of a loved one or a long-lasting illness or hospitalization. Of course, the hope was that these types of services would never become necessary, but knowing that they were there ahead of time meant that, if an emergency did arise, I would know where to go to get help instead of having to try to figure everything out from scratch while in the midst of a crisis.
Finally, the research that I did during this time helped me learn about some of the offerings that became the sources of my earliest friends in college. I learned about the various student clubs and organizations that were on campus and wrote down the ones I was most interested in. When I got to go to my school's Club Fair during orientation, then, I already knew the handful of clubs I absolutely wanted to find in a sea of hundreds of options.
Going in with some background knowledge not only helped me gain more familiarity and comfort with my campus before arriving for move-in but also helped silence some of my most serious "what-if" spirals because I already knew where I could go to get help for any number of emergency or crisis situations.
3. If you can, visit campus—even if you've gone before.
For me, being able to visualize myself on campus helped significantly in quieting my screaming panic to a dull roar. Knowing the actual buildings, pathways, and grounds I'd be traversing each day provided a sort of grounding effect, tethering my projections of what it'd feel like to be on campus to reality instead of a hundred thousand aimless and amorphous possibilities.
I had visited campus several times with my parents to visit a family friend who was a student four years ahead of me, and we had also visited for a campus tour during my college search and application process.
Nevertheless, there was something different about visiting again when I knew that the campus would be my home in just a few short months.
I got to peek through the window of my future dorm, learn the layout of the campus, plan routes to classes and off-campus necessities like grocery stores and emergency services, and seek out the little places off the beaten path that would become my go-to spots when I needed a moment alone. I learned about the public transportation options available to me and tried using them in a situation without the stress of time constraints. I even practiced navigating campus and the surrounding area without my GPS, beginning to build the list of reference points and landmarks that would eventually become familiar markers as I traveled both on and off campus.
This post-acceptance visit allowed me to ground myself in the reality of my campus when I would find myself daydreaming about what the first few days and weeks of freshman year would be like, helping break the seemingly never-ending spirals of worries that had plagued me before I was able to return to the campus.
4. Practice mindfulness and grounding techniques.
Sometimes, try as we might, anxiety grips us and seems as though it'll refuse to let go. In those moments, knowing some techniques that can help break the cycle and communicate to your body that you're not in immediate danger can make all the difference.
One method of doing this is using grounding techniques. These exercises help root your mind in reality by focusing on what you can feel, see, and hear near you, shifting your focus from "what if" to "what is." My favorite version of grounding is what I call a body inventory. Start with your feet and focus on what you can feel. Are you wearing socks that tickle your feet? Or maybe sandals that let your toes feel the breeze? As you focus on what you can feel, begin to evaluate whether you're holding unintentional tension in the muscles of your focus area, and allow yourself to let that tension go. When you finish with one area, move on to the next--I like to break my body into the sections of calves, knees, thighs, hips, waist, torso, arms, shoulders, neck, and head. By forcing your focus on what is real, grounding techniques draw you out of worry spirals, thereby signaling to your mind and body that you are safe.
Another effective tool is an exercise in mindfulness. Most helpful for that low-burn, gnawing type of anxiety that still allows you to function but is annoyingly persistent in its presence, mindfulness encourages you to pause, assess what you're feeling in your body--especially when those sensations have an emotion-based origin--and acknowledge the connection between your emotions and your body. By recognizing, naming, and reflecting on our immediate feelings, we can both validate our current experiences and identify unhelpful cycles or patterns we may have unwittingly slipped into, meaning we are more prepared to break free of them.
I highly recommend practicing and finding your favorite iteration of these techniques. I've found them to be useful in situations ranging from nerves before an important test to fear while waiting in line for a roller coaster.
Bridging the Gap
Moving to college and facing all that that transition includes is no small feat. A change in routine can be disruptive and unsettling, but when everything feels as though it's changing all at once, it can be difficult to overcome the anxiety that stems from the loss of familiarity. The techniques described here were the ones that allowed me to keep the worst of my anxiety-driven behaviors at bay the summer before my freshman year, and I hope that they may be helpful to you, too!